02 Aug My top five reasons why you should stop being ‘nice’ and start being more authentic
Hello, Readers! Today’s post is the first of seven daily posts that I am writing for the Problogger ‘Find Your Blogging Groove’ challenge. It’s meant to encourage bloggers to post more frequently and thoughtfully. I am going to tackle a not-so-easy to discuss issue today, so buckle your seat belts…….
There’s an old saying, “Growing old isn’t for sissies”. There’s a lot of truth to that. Growing old makes you bolder and less patient for nonsense in general. Having been a lifelong people pleaser, I’ve surprised myself quite a bit as I have grown older.
I have a very low tolerance level for boorish, selfish behaviors and I find myself speaking my mind in objection to it more often than not. I guess I figure I have nothing to lose by refusing to accept unacceptable behavior and truth be told, neither do you.
The good news is that you don’t have to wait for gray hairs or saggy skin to appear in order to stand up for yourself. Here are my top five reasons why you should stop being’ nice’ and start being more authentic:
- Accept that you can’t please everybody because it’s impossible. You and your life choices will always be problematic for some people. Is it problematic for you? Because at the end of the day, it is YOUR life. Tell them thanks for their unsolicited opinion, but no thanks. You’re the captain of this ship.
- Discover the miraculous healing of the word, “No”. I get it. There are some people who will not take kindly to your bold decision to tell them to take a flying leap off of a short pier. Trust me, some people actually deserve such harshness, but there are tactful ways of letting people know that you will no longer be their mule of convenience. And that will be your mission, should you choose to accept it (not that I’m telling you what to do).
- Realize that not everyone will be on board when you declare your independence and that’s okay. The beauty is that some people are meant to be in our lives for a season, to teach us lessons and then keep it moving. You will never be able to retain friendships with everyone that you meet. Allowing people to stay whose time in your life has expired is detrimental to you. “Goodbye” is understood in every language.
- It’s good for your physical and mental health. Always trying to be the ‘good’ guy comes with a price. You will run yourself ragged for work, friends, family, and truth be told, once you’re secured a ticket to an early grave, they will keep on living their lives, while you…….well, you know. You can’t be everything to everybody. Know your limits and get rid of that fake smile that you’ve mastered to take the place of honest dialogue.
- You will lose lots of (phantom) weight when you get with the program. Trust me when I tell you that a weight will be lifted from your shoulders and you will actually notice that your posture is still intact when you let go of the emotional vampires who are siphoning the life out of you. They can weigh down your spirit due to their negativity and cockeyed view of the world. You deserve better, now believe it and behave accordingly.